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Please help me stay out of debt after the loss of my love.

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My name’s Lisa, and I feel awful for having to ask for this sort of help. Asking for help generally is hard to do, because I don’t want to put my problems on other people’s shoulders, but money makes it all so much more uncomfortable.

I have to ask for help, though. I can’t do this without help.

My best friend of 8 years, my partner and the woman I considered family took her life on the 15th January. I found her after work, in our home. I don’t feel that I need to go into detail about it, how I feel, what I’ve gone through emotionally - I’m hoping that it’s obvious, at least to some degree. It’s been something close to hell, or perhaps closer to some sort of purgatory. Her pain, and now mine, is a weight I’m still carrying three months later.

I had to leave my job, my home and my support network; I couldn’t afford to stay in our home on just my salary, and I couldn’t afford to rent in the area, which led me to have to move back with my parents a few weeks ago. I had to sort out the house, empty it, get rid of almost all of our furniture because I couldn’t afford to store it. So many of our things, gone.

Any money I had went towards organising furniture removals, bills, living costs, and now I have about £50 to my name and bills needing to come out which I simply cannot afford. Having to deal with financial concerns on top of trying to grieve… it’s too much. It’s just too much. I’m struggling, so much, to cope with the reality of life which I’m having to face.

I don’t need a huge amount, just enough to get me through to my first Universal Credit payment. I know that there are millions of people struggling to pay their own bills right now, but I’m rendered useless by a grief which often feels crippling and flashbacks which are inescapable.

I just need some grace, a little stress removed, so that I don’t have to sit here worrying about debt whilst I’m trying to figure out where my life is going and how to start from scratch at 36 years old, without the person I shared my life with.

Anything helps, sincerely. Anything is just so gratefully received, I can’t put into words how grateful I would be just to receive £5 - everything helps. I’d be so inordinately grateful.

I wish I could put more emotion into this, show how desperate it all feels, but it’s taking all I’ve got just to ask.

Thank you so much for reading.
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Illustration of helping hands

Give £20 and be one of the first to donate

Your donation is the start of Lisa's journey to success. Your early support inspires others to donate.

Make a donation
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Organiser

Lisa Wildman
Organiser
England

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